Clarity at 5am

I’m sitting on the floor of our walk in closet at the El Cordova Hotel on Coronado Island.  It’s 5:47am and I can hear the rain pounding on the roof.  Ryan is sleeping on the other side of the door, and the boys in the next room.  I’m waiting for sunrise so I can take my camera out for a morning walk.

Normally I don’t make a habit of closet sitting in the middle of the night, but today it was just calling to me.  N woke up at 2am with a cold – I had suspected it was coming since L is just getting over his.  Poor kid can’t breath out of his nose, and for a nukie (his word for pacifier) dependent kid, that makes for a rough night.  He was wide awake from 2 – 4:30 and during that time, between trips to his bed to wipe snot off his sleeves and restart his musical dog, I laid in bed, trying to sleep but unable to block out the sound of his rustling, my  husband snoring, and the wind and rain pummeling our second story window.  So, I took advantage of the moments.  I nudged Ryan to roll over, pulled out my kindle, and buried my head in the pillows to read an ebook that I had downloaded on blogging awhile back.  I finished the book in record time and was left with ideas swimming in my head.  Ideas for my own writing, ideas for this little blog.  So I grabbed the computer and headed to the closet.

I love feeling inspired, and sometimes it takes a night of no sleep to sort through all the thoughts and emotions in my head, so I am more than thankful for this moment.  Vacations bring clarity for me, on so many levels.  I may come home tired and worn out with bags of laundry and days of catch up work, but I also come home with new ideas, renewed sense of self, happy kids full of memories, tons of photographs, and a stronger bond between our little family.  And nothing makes me happier than to see the excitement in my kids eyes when they are discovering something new, to see them growing up in front of me, watching what makes them laugh and smile.  That’s what vacations are for.  Uninterrupted family time.  We look for “on off on off” lights, we stop to check out water fountains, we hunt down and explore new parks, we navigate to our favorite gluten free restaurants.  We do our bedtime routines with our pillows and blankets and night time music and nukies and lukie fishies.  We go with the flow, and we slow down just enough to relax.

Today I’m headed to the zoo with the boys.  Ryan is going to work downtown, and the kids and I are going to explore in the rain. I can’t wait to see what the day brings!